(bright whimsical music) – Hey you guys, it’s
Dana, and it’s Tuesday, so it’s time to talk about money. And it’s a new year. So Happy New Year. There couldn’t be a better
time to talk about shame. Okay so really, it’s the new year and New Year’s is really the perfect time to admit to yourself and
to others around you, maybe just your partner, that you made a mistake, made a mistake with
money, with your finances, and it can be incredibly,
incredibly hard to admit that and a lot of times couples
are carrying around a lot of shame when it comes to money. And I speak from personal experience. I feel as if this was a
really difficult thing for me to deal with, and the fact that I have made mistakes and if you’ve watched our
video where I talk about how we stopped living
paycheck to paycheck, I mean you can understand. We had so much debt and I felt as if I, I felt ashamed, I was
walking around feeling as if I literally had a chain
around my neck, choking me. I was drowning, as if I
had done something wrong, which I had but I felt as if I had made, I couldn’t understand because
it was explained to me growing up, that people borrow money, that you need to have a high credit score, that a high credit score is
the most important thing. That’s what I was taught, and obviously that’s what
a lot of people believe and so I started borrowing money, got my first credit card at 16, and so I have had, I had
had debt for so long, and it was crushing, it
was crushing and I felt really shameful about it
and it was embarrassing to talk about it. But most things that
you feel shameful about are things that are secrets, and so the best way to
get rid of that shame and to release it, and to
release yourself from that is to not make it a secret anymore. If you can talk about it and
get it out there in the open, and at least start with your partner and those you love, who are close to you and just start to talk about it. And it’s okay to say, hey look, I made mistakes, and I was not so smart but now we’re gonna do
better moving forward, looking to the future. We’re going to make different choices and we’re going to not
be so dumb with our money going forward, right? So supposedly, seven out of 10 households are living paycheck to paycheck. So seven out of the 10
houses on your street, they are living paycheck to paycheck, they don’t have it all together. So obviously, you’re not the only one who has had difficulty with money. You’re not the only one
who is buried in debt and feels that crushing weight. Other people do too, they
just don’t talk about it, they don’t discuss it. So you’re not alone, so there’s no reason to beat yourself up about it. The best thing to do is to
just come clean about it and to just say, like I said, you messed up, get it out of
the dark and move forward. So that way it wont’ be so shameful. You won’t have that feeling of just, walking around,
holding it in to yourself. So there is a lot of freedom in discussing it and working
together with your partner or with your support system, working together to try to fix it. Right now, this is the year to fix it or at least begin fixing it. Put your foot on the
path because if you don’t put your foot on the path, and start taking those steps, you’re never gonna get to the end, right? So you just have to begin. So make this new year your year that you’re going to start
to be smart with your money and to begin, by getting out of debt. We’re all taught to handle
our money differently by our parents, by society, but a lot of it is the same, borrowing money in our culture, that’s what people will do. I listen to the radio when I go to work and the commercials, they’re all about low
APR, zero money down, I mean almost every
commercial is a car commercial or something, trying to
encourage us to finance things. Commercials on TV, and then
even when I talk to people, often they’re talking
about their car payment and it’s unbelievable how bombarded we are with this message that debt is okay. But it’s really not. If you have debt, and
you have a lot of debt then you understand. It’s just that crushing
feeling, that weight, that literally presses down on you and it takes away your feeling of security and joy and freedom and when
you buy things with cash, it is completely, a completely
different experience, different feeling, and
if you’ve never done it, then maybe you don’t
know what that feels like so it’s hard to compare, but you must, you know what it feels like to have a lot of debt,
it’s not a good feeling. So, in order to get out of it, to get free from it, the first step is to talk about it with your partner, your loved ones, maybe your pastor, just bring
it out there in the open and just begin to take the steps to fix it and get it out of your life, get rid of it in this new year, all right? Okay, so I’m working on
a video of creative ways to post your debt repayment plan. You can do charts, people do thermometers, I’m working on a video
to put that together so if you have any ideas to help others, as far as how you post it,
to make it more visible, to get it out there in the open, to both yourself and maybe others who might come into your home space, I’d love to hear those, share those down below in the comments. So let’s try to make this next year about being more, about bringing it out, bringing it out of the dark
and letting go of the shame. All right? Okay you guys, if it’s
your first time here, be sure to subscribe and
for every single Tuesday, talking all about money, and I am a mom of four kids, we live in the Philadelphia area, and I’m a wife and I also
work in Finance full time, outside the home and I
do this YouTube thing because I’ve been doin’ it for years, I can’t imagine not doing it, and I hope it helps you guys to build wealth, get out of debt, and it helps us to stay on track with our financial goals as well, all right? Okay, I’ll talk to you
in the next video, bye.